I seem to be having quite a few humiliating experiences these days. I have reached the age where remembering to zip my pants is a challenge. But this past week, I was humiliated and it wasn’t even my fault. The barber was putting the finishing touches on my new coif and he mumbles “yea, hang on a sec, let me get those ear hairs for you.”
I have ear hair. I won’t drag this out like some lame open mike comedian; suffice to say I am damaged goods. This means my life is almost over. I already consider staying up until 9:30 pm an accomplishment and 4:30 a perfectly reasonable time for supper. I have only a few life stages left: I will soon believe that my bowel activity is of interest to everyone, followed by slow walking, driving by Braille and finally “APRIL, what did you do with my teeth!”
I have often said that there are only a couple of verses of scriptures that I can prove and one is “life is a vapor, it appears only for a moment.” It makes sad to think that I am getting old. I wish it made me glad, to think that I will soon live in eternity, and not even have to worry about zippers. But I can not shake the feeling that I missed too much, messed up too much. The feeling that life is too fast is a constant shadow. The brakes have gone out, the hill is steep and I sense myself uncontrollably accelerating towards eternity.
The Bible is filled with folks like me. I think an entire book, called Ecclesiastes, was written by a guy whose barber clipped his ear hair. And it made him think. Only a couple of options are available to me: freeze in fear, or make each moment count. I bet God is wanting the latter, to help me overcome fear and immobility. Besides, aren’t the best rides at the park always the fastest?