When he was gone, Jesus said, “Now is the Son of Man glorified and God is glorified in him. If God is glorified in him, God will glorify the Son in himself, and will glorify him at once.
“My children, I will be with you only a little longer. You will look for me, and just as I told the Jews, so I tell you now: Where I am going, you cannot come.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

5 funerals in 4 years.
Perhaps those aren’t terrible odds. But, for my heart, that ratio is too big. 5 times too big.

9 babies of friends have been born in the past 4 years.
All healthy. All thriving.
For my heart this is good news. This is a sign of new life.

My “Granpa” just died. His name was William Alexander Romig. He told me stories of selling strawberries in the summertime from a wagon he pulled through the neighborhood to help his family earn money. He could hike through the mountains and tell me what all the different plants were. He had been a recovered alcoholic for over 40 years. He told my sister that my daughters were “something else”. He began to learn to paint when he was in his late 60’s. He and I always made turkey salad after Thanksgiving. My son was named after him. He said he was painfully shy. Literally. And yet, he didn’t stop talking until he drew his last breath.
His body was here and yet Bill/Dad/Granpa/Papa Bill wasn’t here. With eyes closed he talked to his wife, my Granma, who died almost a year ago. They rode motorcycles. He asked for a cherry vodka and a cigarette. He demanded root beer. And he said he saw Jesus. He saw Jesus standing and holding a door open. And Jesus told Bill that he wouldn’t close the door until Bill had walked all the way through. And this morning Bill walked all the way through.

And, though I know that my Granpa wasn’t Jesus. He said something over and over in the last year of his life (the first year in over 60 years that he wasn’t with his wife) that sounded like something that Jesus said. He said that he wanted all of us to take the time to love each other and hold each others hands. Anytime I saw him he would just grab my hand and hold it. He held it firmly. Gently.

I know that he was looking back over his life and I didn’t hear him talk about work or projects or his financial status. I heard him talk about love. And wishing he had more time to love. And hold hands.

“My children, I will be with you only a little longer. You will look for me, and just as I told the Jews, so I tell you now: Where I am going, you cannot come.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Where Granma went, Granpa couldn’t follow. And he missed loving her.
Where Granpa went I cannot follow. And I will miss loving him and being loved by him.
Where Jesus went I cannot follow. And I don’t even know how much I’m missing by being here instead of with him. But, in a way I am where Jesus went. I’m present in this time and place where I can still follow his words. I can love. I can love anyone and everyone. I can take the time away from work, projects and money to go and hold someone’s hand. Gently. Firmly. Lovingly. And Jesus is with us. Living in Love.

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 2nd, 2010 at 8:59 pm and is filed under God's love, christa, relationships. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.