planting a church is hard. planting a church that is committed to trying wacky things is harder. planting a church that is committed to being safe for wacky people (as in every human being, when we’re really honest) is even harder. the reason we have chosen the harder path is that we believe simply and firmly in grace. not theoretical grace. not grace when it works in our favor. not grace that is just a nice Christian word. to us, grace means cutting each other a lot of slack, offering a ton of mercy and understanding instead of judgement. we’re not saying that there’s not a lot of grace offered out there in the wider Christian community. of course there is, but in the average church there’s not a ton of need for a lot of it to be dispensed. really, people’s craziness isn’t rubbing against each other too much. you sit, you listen, you pass out bulletins, you go home. you might need to give grace to the guy that stole your parking spot or the person that decided to talk to his wife during the worship in front of you, but the truth is that for the most part, real grace isn’t necessary.
but what happens when you really share your lives together in community? show up on sunday, open the floor and give room for comments and thoughts from all over the place? what happens when even the people in “leadership” don’t hide and say their crazy thoughts out loud? what happens when there’s not a program to hide behind but just this raw, real authentic entrance into the messiness of life? what happens when you don’t let only pros sing and play? what happens when people feel safe enough to share really deep things out loud? here’s our guess: some of us want to run for the hills as fast as we can!
why, because we begin to realize “this kind of place requires a high degree of grace and i’m not sure i have it to give.” we totally understand this dilemma. we know how much easier it would be if some great speaker or singer stood up front and put on a great, inspirational show that would make everyone love us and think we were the greatest thing since sliced bread and everyone could go home feeling jolly. but we know we can do that week after week without ever really living in community together. and Jesus’ design for the Body of Christ was real community not “going to church.”
real community requires an incredible amount of grace. it means seeing beyond the moment into the bigger picture. it is realizing that God is at work in people’s lives even when we can’t see it. it demands cutting each other slack. it asks people to supersede selfish comfort. it means we give the person next to us a break and then the next time they give us one, too. it means recognizing that everyone isn’t the same and seeing the power and value of diversity. it means loving unconditionally, not just when it feels good or people “do what we wish they would do”.
our ability to give grace has probably increased over the past 15 months we have been together, but to be honest, we suck at receiving it. so here goes—we are going to ask for it directly. the refuge needs continued grace. we need continued grace. we are just doing the best we can for the given moment and it is harder than you can imagine to not give up and throw in the towel. we must fight to be a place that can give & receive grace. it must work two ways—we can’t expect others to give it to us in a moment and then the next minute turn around and be unwilling to give it. we believe wholeheartedly that the ways that God conforms us to his image is in relationship with each other—what better place, then, to learn Jesus’ ways of kindness, sacrifice, love, forgiveness, humility, and yes, grace than in a community of people who are choosing to learn a better way of living. but, there’s no doubt, the cost is pretty high—it’s brutally hard. it will require us to get in touch with our selfish, judgmental ways, and it takes a ton of time. not super appealing on the surface, but Jesus was never about the surface. it was always about something deeper.
we honestly think that Jesus is calling us all to grace and we’re a little bit afraid of it….what are your thoughts?
I love the passion I feel in these words and I believe these words. I’m glad we can share our craziness and dig into each other’s lives with community and grace and most of all love.
until a few years ago i had no concept of what grace really was. it was a nice “church” word, but had little meaning. i don’t remember receiving much (and i know i never gave any), so i never changed.
and messiness. YUK. i couldn’t stand it. i have enough of my own crap why on earth would i want to be deal with yours.
then it happened. God got a hold of my heart. He put some awesome people in my life. i received grace. boat loads of grace. i was set free of crap i had struggled with for decades. i’ll never quite understand what happened, but as i started receiving grace i was compelled to give it to others. the messiness of others was no longer a barrier to our relationship, but it became a bridge, a connection that drew us closer to one another. i’ll take grace and messiness over legalism and perfection, anytime.
mike