KATHY - follow me

February 8th, 2010

“One day as Jesus was preaching on the shore of the Sea of Galilee, great crowds pressed in on him to listen to the word of God. He noticed two empty boats at the water’s edge, for the fishermen had left them and were washing their nets. Stepping into one of the boats, Jesus asked Simon, its owner, to push it out into the water. So he sat in the boat and taught the crowds from there. When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Now go out where it is deeper, and let down your nets to catch some fish.” “Master,” Simon replied, “we worked hard all last night and didn’t catch a thing. But if you say so, I’ll let the nets down again.” And this time their nets were so full of fish they began to tear! A shout for help brought their partners in the other boat, and soon both boats were filled with fish and on the verge of sinking. When Simon Peter realized what had happened, he fell to his knees before Jesus and said, “Oh, Lord, please leave me—I’m too much of a sinner to be around you.” For he was awestruck by the number of fish they had caught, as were the others with him. His partners, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, were also amazed. Jesus replied to Simon, “Don’t be afraid! From now on you’ll be fishing for people!” And as soon as they landed, they left everything and followed Jesus.” luke 5:11, NLT

this past saturday night we had a fun conversation about the calling of the first disciples in luke 5:1-11. part of the power in the Bible is being able to identify with the story, to notice the intersections with our own life & to notice what God might be stirring up in us in the midst. in our conversation together there were a few observations about the story that i want to highlight here for those of you who weren’t there and are just reading for the first time.

God always chose the least likely. these lowly fisherman weren’t the last pick, the ones left over. they were the first pick. i don’t think we can ever dismiss the message that Jesus continues to embody–the ways of the kingdom are totally counter-cultural to the ways of the world and many religious systems. when peter saw the loads of fish in the net, he cried out “i’m not worthy.” my guess is that many of us feel unworthy, too. what do we have to offer God? what do we have to offer others? maybe in the world we don’t have the skills or the talents or the put-togetherness, but in the kingdom none of that seems to matter. this passage cries out “the least, the last, the willing”, that’s who Jesus seems to continually point to.

to be a disciple means that we must become students of the Teacher. that means that we will have to humble ourselves and respect that we have a lot to learn. we can all say that in theory but actually submitting ourselves to the master’s teaching is whole other story. “following” requires humility & a softening of our pride, ego, and all things that keep us in control of our own destinies and comforts. also, students don’t learn everything at once; real learning is a forever process. we are more infiltrated with the worldly message of “quick, easy, success” than we probably even know, and i’m guessing it really affects our ability to lean into the long & never-ending work of ongoing transformation.

everyone’s “calling” is different & one isn’t more important or better than another. for some, it is a big one–God is asking us to make some big shifts in our life, give up something that is comfortable and familiar for an entirely new direction. for others, it might just be a prompting to risk ourselves in a way we aren’t used, a calling to trust God through action in a relationship, situation, or experience. and then there’s everything in between. the big idea is that if we each have to listen to what Jesus is stirring up in us individually. what is he calling us to that scares us, no matter how big or small.

if we listen to the voices rattling in our head or from the outside, we will always find ways not to go. we explored some of the voices that come rushing in when we hear the stirring, the call to “follow”, whatever that may look like some of these voices might say “what if you fail?” “you’re not good enough to do it”, “what if that’s not really God’s voice?” “it’s just not possible” “who do you think you are trying that?” “change is just too hard” “what if i heard wrong?” the list could go on and on, but in this passage it seems to me these first disciples didn’t spend too much time listening to the voices. they took a chance, they went.

marty shared a quote she had recently heard that is really worth pondering,

“fear, resistance and struggle is all in your head.  your heart is the part with the courage and the wisdom. live from there.  act from there.”

there were so many other thoughts shared. if you were there and have a few others that stuck out to you, please share them here.

this year i really want to explore what it means to humble myself & follow. to go where i’m afraid to go. to follow God’s lead to the low and scary places. to learn what it means to be a student of the master.

ps: at the end of our gathering, we had a little journaling exercise to take home and consider this week for those that wanted to explore this idea a little more. here are the questions:

  • Read Luke 5:1-11
  • Looking back, what are some decisions that you have made that have made you proud, that you are glad you took?
  • Is God stirring up something in your heart, a step you are contemplating to somehow ”follow him”?
  • How will this step require humility?  Courage?
  • What are some of the obstacles in the way (real or perceived or just things rattling around in your head) that might keep you from moving forward?  What would it look like to overcome them?
  • What would you like to see transformed in your life journey?
  • Read Psalm 138

Posted in jesus, journey, kathy | No Comments »

transition colorado - our grange neighbors!

February 1st, 2010

we are thankful to have new neighbors at the grange: transition westminster/arvada/broomfield. we have mentioned the work that they are doing at different times over the past few months, but we thought it would be good for you to hear from them directly and know more about the work that they are doing in our community. the refuge is thankful for their spirit and dedication to community and look forward to sharing space and ideas in the months and years to come. you can learn more about upcoming events at www.transitioncolorado.ning.com

this article was written by don studinski (thanks don!) & hopefully will give all of us a greater sense of their vision and passion.

Transition Westminster / Arvada / Broomfield (TWAB for short) is  a social network group with its roots in Transition Colorado which, in turn, is a part of the international Transition movement started in England by Rob Hopkins.  Transition is about moving from our current unsustainable way of life (key issues include Peak Oil, which means we will have less energy in our future, environmental depletion, which means we are exceeding sustainable use of natural resources, and economic collapse, which means we are living beyond our means) toward a more sustainable and pleasant way of life which can include an endless list of possibilities limited only by our imaginations.  Wow, that’s a mouth full!

Hopefully, I haven’t lost you already.  Those of us in TWAB want very much to be a positive force within our community, not a doom and gloom group.  Specifically, we describe ourselves with this statement:  “A community of citizens that believes we have the power to build community resilience and self-reliance such that all species, now and in the future, will be able to meet their basic needs while maintaining a healthy planet.”  Anyone is welcome to join.  It’s free.  As of this writing, 1/11/2010, we have 49 members in our online group and about 10 to 20 actively involved with our events.  Our members are as close as walking-distance to the grange and as far away as Thailand.

Transition initiatives, like TWAB, exist to “unleash the collective genius of their own people to find the answers to this big question: for all those aspects of life that this community needs in order to sustain itself and thrive, how are we going to:
significantly rebuild resilience (in response to peak oil)?
drastically reduce carbon emissions (in response to climate change)?
Typically, self-determined solutions will involve some flavor of relocalisation.”
Everything TWAB does relates back to rebuilding community resilience and self-reliance, but beyond that there are no limits.  Examples of our 2009 events include:
Building the Broomfield Community Permaculture Garden at the Presbyterian Church of Broomfield,
Hosting a community seed exchange,
Hosting several pot-luck dinners,
Showing several documentary films (we call this awareness raising),
Attending a “listening session” with some state senators,
Hosting a Northwest Earth Institute class called Voluntary Simplicity,
Hosting a canning class,
Hosting a composting class.
Hosting a Pachamama Alliance class called Awakening The Dreamer

We started in January, 2009, with 7 people in a coffee shop.  It didn’t take long for TWAB members to realize that we needed a place, beyond our member homes, to hold our events.  Therefore, a few TWAB members joined the Crescent Grange.  As members of the grange community, we have the good fortune to be able to use the building for significant events, and, beyond that, to create a community garden at the grange.  We call it Crescent Grange Community Permaculture Garden which we will be building in 2010.  This gives our group a sense of “place” much like the Broomfield Community Permaculture Garden did in 2009 (this will continue in 2010 as well).  We now have a bulletin board in the Southwest corner of the building where we will post flyers about community events.  This will include all the community events we learn about, not just TWAB sponsored events.  For example, there are Broomfield Auditorium Cultural events posted over there right now.

We have visions of all sorts of community-building events and activities we hope to do in 2010 and beyond.  Examples include growing an abundance of food, building a hoop house on the grange property, holding a clothing exchange, holding periodic book exchanges, creating a community “resilience” library, helping with grange maintenance and improvement, planting an orchard of fruit and nut trees, teaching classes in composting, permaculture gardening, canning and drying herbs and vegetables, sewing, beekeeping and others, holding monthly community dances, game nights and drum circles.  We are limited only by the time, energy and ideas our members bring.  We whole-heartedly invite everyone to participate.  If you like one of these ideas, or have your own, please, feel free to make it happen!  Clearly, no one of us can do all this alone.

Our community resilience is completely dependent upon the web of relationships we build among ourselves.  Everyone has value to bring and we all benefit from our combined cooperation and effort.  We look forward to an exciting 2010 in community at the Crescent Grange.  If you have any questions or comments for TWAB please feel free to contact us on-line or call Don Studinski at 303-248-6677.

The garden at the grange is coming soon, so if you are interested contact Don!

http://transitioncolorado.ning.com/group/transitionwestminster
http://transitioncolorado.ning.com
http://transitionculture.org/
http://www.postcarbon.org/
http://transitiontowns.org/TransitionNetwork/TransitionNetwork
http://www.nwei.org/
http://pachamama.org/
http://awakeningthedreamer.org/

Posted in community, the grange | No Comments »

MIKE - successful vs. fruitful

January 25th, 2010


in our western culture we seem to confuse material wealth and success with the abundant life, promised us in john 10:10. when good things happen in our lives, we proclaim how God has blessed us. as long as it is good it has to be of God. but if it’s something hurtful, harmful or opposite of what we want it must come from some where else. after all, james 1:17 says: “whatever is good and perfect come to us from God above….” but what about those things that we don’t perceive as good? could they come from God as well? and could these things actually be the abundant life that we are promised???

henri nouwen writes in a devotional titled “fruits that grow in vulnerability”:

“there is a great difference between successfulness and fruitfulness. success comes from strength, control and respectability. a successful person has the energy to create something, to keep control over it’s development and make it available in large quantities. success brings many rewards and often fame. fruits, however, come from weakness  and vulnerability. and fruits are unique. a child is conceived in vulnerability. community is the fruit born through shared brokenness. and intimacy is the fruit that grows through touching one an others wounds. let’s remind one another that what brings us joy is not success, but fruitfulness.”

success and riches can, in many ways, make life easier and better, to be sure, but they never guarantee a joyful life. in fact they can become a barrier in our quest to have the life God has for us. j paul getty, who was, before bill gates, the richest man in the world, said two interesting things. when asked how much money was enough he said: “just one dollar more”. he also said: “i would have given all my fortune to have had one of my marriages work”. in contrast, everyone, rich or poor, can experience the joy of fruitfulness. the shared brokenness of community and the intimacy that develops by touching someone’s wounds and having them touch ours is transforming. i know of no greater joy than that of walking through the sorrows of life in the redemptive community of broken people.

if we reads the 10th verse of john we will see that the whole chapter is a comparison between Jesus, the Good Shepherd and us, His sheep, and a  shepherd and his flock. just as the sheep were safe from the wolves if they stayed close to the shepherd and listened to his voice, we, too, will be safe from the powers of darkness, if we stay close and listen to the voice of our Master. i see nowhere in the scripture where we are promised a life of abundance, although some Christ followers may experience this (along with many who do not follow Him). we are, however, promised an abundant life, an eternal life, as we follow Him.
i want my life to be fruitful, not successful.

and just as the jews missed the coming of their Savior, because He didn’t come to earth the way they had expected Him too, i hope will not miss the abundant life we have been promised because it doesn’t look or feel the way we thought it would.

Posted in community, mike | 2 Comments »

2010 refuge prayer

January 18th, 2010

as we focus on the church calendar together at our saturday evening gatherings and continue to cultivate the spirit and ethos of our life together in community, we will be using this closing prayer together.  we hope the repetition of these words help penetrate our hearts–individually and corporately–and move us toward Jesus and each other.

God,
we cry for mercy, show us your way.
Jesus,
we are here, help us listen and learn.
Holy Spirit,
we are available, give us humble hearts, open minds, willing hands and feet.

we are here to practice and try.
we need you to pierce our pride,
infuse us with courage.

we want to be sober.
we want to love.
we want to live.
we want to be agents of hope and peace.

teach us how to love Jesus, others, ourselves.
teach us how to be loved by Jesus, others, ourselves.

amen.

Posted in God's love, prayer | No Comments »

KATHY - the church calendar, refuge style

January 4th, 2010

when you hear the words “church calendar” what do you think?

when you hear the word “liturgical” what do you think?

different people have different reactions. some might say “i have no idea what either one means.” others might think “liturgical means something lutheran, catholic or episcopalian and it’s usually boring.” because we are a community with an extremely wide breadth and depth of faith experiences, we always want to be cautious about throwing in words and ideas and thoughts that could exclude or throw people for a loop. at the same time, we are deeply dedicated to filling in the space between all of our diversity and finding our common thread. that thread, i believe, is Jesus. sure, there are people who aren’t quite sure about Jesus or have all kinds of weird associations with him that typically come from wacky church experiences, but the one thing we seem to be fairly clear on is that we are trying to learn what it means to follow Jesus. i like to think of our life together as a community as a place to learn what it means to “love Jesus, others, and ourselves and learn to be loved by Jesus, others, ourselves.” it’s a place to learn, a place to practice.

this year together at our saturday evening gatherings we are going to do something we have never intentionally done together since the refuge started 3 1/2 years ago–follow the church calendar. this means that instead of us as a community randomly deciding which passages or themes to use each week, we will use what millions of other Christ-followers around the world are using at the same time. for those of you who aren’t familiar with it, the new year of the church calendar starts with advent, which is the last sunday (saturday for us) in november. we’ve always celebrated advent as a community but then just left it there at christmas eve. this year, we’ll continue with the seasons of the church year all the way through until advent 2010 and see how we do. remember, everything will still be refuge-style. conversational, interactive, experiential, weekly communion and eating together. i think what will be really good for us is we’re going to learn a lot together. we’ll use the gospel passages–the stories of Jesus–as our guiding thoughts. we’ll intersect with the scriptures in ways that we might not have before. we’ll hopefully stir up some trouble–good trouble, the kind that moves us, transforms us.

here’s a helpful way to maybe think through the church seasons. it comes from the story formed calendar:

advent - the season of expectation
christmas - the season of celebration
epiphany (this is where we are now, the upcoming weeks are called “ordinary time”) - the season of illumination
lent - the season of listening
holy week - a time to remember
easter - the season of “hallelujahs” and the
season after pentecost becomes the season of intentional living in love, justice and mercy, in praise and gratitude

my take on it is that it is going to be a challenging & inspiring & fun year for us a community. i am excited about orienting my heart and my head toward the big story of God in a new way, to intersecting with the gospel stories from new angles and letting their power stir up new life in me.

i love that we are a community that is willing to try new, creative things on our faith/life journey together. so much beauty awaits.

i’ll close with this, i think it’s what our year holds for us, what our faith/life journey through the gospels will remind us of, point us to:

“it is in the contemplation of the mysteries of the faith, the deep-down wrestling match of conflicting ideas, that resides the motivating power it takes to become what we see in Jesus.  the world around us tells us that life is about money, security, power, and success.  but the Gospels tell us that life is about something completely other.  real life, the Gospels tell us, is about doing the will of God, speaking for the poor, changing the lives of widows and orphans, exalting the status of women, refusing to make war, laying down our lives for the other, the invisible, and the enemy.  it is about taking everyone in instead of leaving everyone out.” - joan chittister, the liturgical year.

here’s to a beautiful, challenging year together. i’ve got a lot to learn. i hope you do, too.

Posted in church stuff, kathy | 3 Comments »

Nativity Prayer

December 28th, 2009

As we continue the season of Christmas and move toward Epiphany, meditate on this reminder of the gift of Christ’s incarnation, from St. Bernard of Clairvaux (1090-1153)

Let Your goodness Lord appear to us, that we
made in your image, conform ourselves to it.
In our own strength
we cannot imitate Your majesty, power, and wonder
nor is it fitting for us to try.
But Your mercy reaches from the heavens
through the clouds to the earth below.
You have come to us as a small child,
but you have brought us the greatest of all gifts,
the gift of eternal love
Caress us with Your tiny hands,
embrace us with Your tiny arms
and pierce our hearts with Your soft, sweet cries.

Amen.

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thin places: vigilance

December 22nd, 2009

a video reflection from our 4th week of advent.

Posted in advent, journey, prayer | 2 Comments »

KARL - Thin Places: Surprise

December 14th, 2009

exclamation mark and gift boxMy wife threw a surprise party for my 40th birthday. There was lots of secrecy and fake errands to run, culminating with my appearance at the club house where 40-50 friends had gathered. It was really fun, but I have small confession:  I was not surprised.  I looked surprised–the hard work of April and the expectations of my friends demanded I feign the expected reaction. But, truth be told, I was expecting a big party.  And it is very hard to be surprised when you expect a party.  I had given her a big party for her 35th, and I felt like I deserved one in return.

If you have been following along with the Refuge advent, you know that our “thin place” this week is surprise, guided by the experience of the shepherds in Luke 2.  Saturday night, we talked about how the story is filled with the surprise of an unexpected choir, the unlikely shepherds, the size of the saviour, even the scope of the good news–to all people everywhere.

It is clear the shepherds made a cosmic contact.  They were touched by God and were shouting for joy at the encounter.  Imagine how different the story would be if the lamb jockeys had my attitude–“Hey, i deserve this. I paid my dues, and it is about time that God noticed me.”

I often have conversations with folks who seem ripped off by God. I know the feeling–looking around, feeling that somehow I am not as chosen, blessed, anointed as the rest of the schmucks in the world. Funny, God never seems to respond to a “Hey, get over here and give me some of what I deserve!”

I wonder if in our desire to be close to God we confuse anticipating with deserving?  Maybe my lack of thin places is my arrogance in believing I deserve an encounter, or worse yet, have earned it. The shepherds did not have to fake a smile or shocked look. Somehow it seems that humility opened heaven’s doors.

During this Advent I am going to try and anticipate and look, but not feel entitled.  I’ll let you know how I do.

Posted in advent, karl | 2 Comments »

JENNY - Thin Places: Silence

December 7th, 2009

Two gifts were delivered by an angel:

One.

…your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you will name him John. You will have joy and gladness…

and Two.

…because you won’t believe me, you’ll be unable to say a word until the day of your son’s birth.

The first is a joy-filled answer to the prayers of an old man and woman. The second is a surprise sign that God is at work. It doesn’t seem like a gift—more like a rebuke; but it indeed contains a gift for Zechariah–the gift of silence.

Unable to speak for nine months, the rhythm of his day would likely be punctuated with silent prayer and reflection. When his voice is mysteriously restored he astonishes his relatives and community by using the name that God had selected for his son. (It was expected that the child would be called Zechariah, after his father.) Something must have strengthened him during his time out while waiting for the baby’s arrival. In glad obedience he begins to prophesy and offer a song of praise to God known to Christians down through the ages as the Benedictus.

thin places-refuge advent

Advent - Thin Places

In our 2nd week of Advent we consider how silence and the waiting that goes along with it can be a thin place to encounter God. Silence is a place that is pregnant with pause. It is a place of possibility. As we enter a time of silence and open ourselves to what we haven’t been listening to or noticing, there is a chance that we might experience an acute awareness of God with us in that quiet space.

Are we willing to risk being quiet?
Are we willing to risk a softening of heart?
Are we willing to just be for a moment?
Can silence become a gift to us?

We, like Zechariah, may discover or re-discover a language of prayer in the rhythm of our day. It may remind us along our journey of what Zechariah sang:

By the tender mercy of our God, the dawn from on high will break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.

May you have the courage today to find a quiet moment where you can breathe deeper and receive whatever gift silence brings you.

Posted in advent, jenny, prayer | 7 Comments »

KATHY - thin places: validation

November 30th, 2009


God of the watching ones, the waiting ones, the slow and suffering ones, give us your benediction, your good word for our souls, that we may rest.
- celtic advent blessing

this past saturday we entered into the season of “advent” in preparation for Christ’s birth.  for those not as familiar with church-y terms, advent is the season of expectation, waiting, and hoping–all leading up to Christmas.  this year at the refuge we will be following our advent tradition by using urban skye’s advent guide to bind this month together.  this year the four weeks are focused on the celtic tradition; it’s called “thin places.”   thin places are certain places where the distance between the human and the Divine feel particularly thin, where God feels near.

God touches us in all kinds of mysterious ways.  one tangible way God’s spirit moves is through people–through the touch and  love of an “anam cara”, which is the celtic word for “soul friend.”  the passage this week from luke 1:39-45 focuses on mary, the mother of Jesus, and her interaction with her cousin elizabeth, who is the mother of john the baptist.  they share a special bond, a connection.  elizabeth validated mary in a moment she really needed it.  the Bible doesn’t go into all the ins and outs of the relationship, but what rises is to the surface is that God touched  mary through elizabeth.

this season is especially difficult for so many.  lack of money, health, jobs, family are just a few of the reasons some dread this holiday.   but  here’s my hope for all of us–let’s intentionally strip away all of the man-made trappings of Christmas and focus not on what isn’t, but what is.  to recall the beauty & mystery of the Jesus story–who came not as a powerful king but as a homeless baby in a dingy manger.  that the “incarnation”–God made flesh–is real.  available.  now.   through each other.

so this advent i hope we can cling to slivers of hope–the small, mysterious, sometimes almost imperceptible ways God is trying to show us love, hope, and peace in the midst of our circumstance.  may we somehow experience a “thin place”–an intersection with God, an outburst of peace & hope, no matter how big or small.

and in the spirit of week one’s conversation, may we notice God speaking to us through people, through “anam caras”–soul friends.   touching us through the unexpected phone call, the loving hug, prayers, the kind words, some tangible presence in a weird unexpected moment.

may we notice.  may we let good in.  may we receive.  may we give.  may we have hope.

i’ll close with the prayer that wrapped up our saturday evening together–it’s a friendship blessing written by john o’donohue:

may you blessed with good friends.
may you learn to be a good friend yourself.
may you be brought into the real passion, kinship, and affinity of belonging.

may they bring you all the blessings, challenges, truth, and light that you need for your journey.  amen.

Posted in advent, hope, kathy | 3 Comments »

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